Surprisingly, this is a wonderful pie. You’ll want to hush your mouth just so you can eat more than one slice of this outlandish pie!
And, by all means, “lettuce” (let us) put some whipped cream on the very top! Homemade, of course. No other way to have it!
Outlandish, because it is! It’s ridiculous! Made of beans! But here’s proof something so bizarre can turn out darn-tootin’ “far out” good!! !
What typically goes with beans?–a large pot of beans cooked on the stove?–It’s cornbread.
There better be cornbread in the oven when ham and beans are slow-cooking on the stove!
Beans and cornbread go hand-in-hand like a whistle in a mouth–like stopping at a stop sign before crossing the street–like a cherry on a sundae–a hand in a glove; so on and so on… This bean pie is meant to have a crispy cornbread pie crust to pair with–to make it complete! It’s the butter-and-bread to this pie. A beans ‘n cornbread pie!
Cornmeal mix has flour in the bag, not straight-up cornmeal. Flour, a necessity in pie crust–“duh”!! Plus, we don’t want the crust to be too grainy in texture–so we’re going with the mix!
And needless to say, we have to have lots of full-fat butter! No skimming or skimping, remember?!
During the American Civil War, cornbread became very popular to bake at home because it was cheap to buy. And it could easily be made into so many different dishes; its use also cooked into stove top dishes.
But the SUNFLOWER company began in 1874. The Civil War among the States was between 1861 and 1865. Americans against Americans, through rioting and bloodshed of disagreement… Could it be that the protestors across our Nation, present-day in this pandemic, could cause such a senseless upheaval in our Country close to that time in our land? A shame and pity that people think/believe that matters have to resort in violence against fellow Americans.
“Very good people” (Trump=delusional) would not do that, in MI or outside of MI.
If anything, besides this virus, what’s needed to be put to death or threatened to exist, is racism.
We covered that through our History; it does not need to be repeated.
Let’s turn a new leaf, on everything. I promise to shut my mouth, now, so we can get this pie made and baked!
To begin with the crust, measure 1 1/2 cups cornmeal mix. Then 1/2 cup plain flour and 1/2 cup sugar. Whisk altogether.
Cut in 3/4 cup cubed cold, salted butter.
Next, very cold beer–1 teaspoon at a time, small drizzle at a time! Keep mashing with a fork. It will fizz up. Don’t let it get too wet; and definitely, not too dry.
Since this is not like any other dough, sprinkle light dusting of flour before turning out onto a surface to gently form into 2 discs.
Don’t handle it too much!
Wrap in plastic wrap for 2 to 3 days in the fridge or freezer before rollling out into pie dough for crust!
Completely delusional!
Several days later, here we are! How ’bout that.
It will fall apart. And it’s fine. It won’t be stiff dough. It’s acceptable.
Carefully roll it out; flip sides onto flour. Baby it. You’ll have to.
Gently and carefully roll it up around the rolling pin…
…and place it into the pie plate. It will look so rustic and sloppily done!
Now stop with the rolling pin! Lay all weapons aside! Take itsy-bitsy fingers, little hands, and form it OUT to the rim of the plate!
You’re workin’ it!
Semi-pre-bake the crust, but not as long as I had it in the oven! If the crust is not slightly pre-baked, everything baked at the same time, the cornbread crust will crumble into the runny batter–such a mess!
Every pie has to have form. The shell.
Prick the pie on the bottom and sides with a fork to keep it from slumping during the pre-bake. Put it in the oven at 325 for a light color–I have to be real with you on this!–I didn’t time myself. I hurriedly threw it together, slapped it up like a mad man. I shoved dishes in a frenzy of crazy baking. I made Phyllis Diller look like a well-kept female with sauce and class and professionalism. !
See, here’s where we ought to admit when we flunk an assignment! But, still, you can cut off the burnt crust or cover it up with whipped cream!
Seriously.
Now the mashing of ‘the grapes’! We’re not putting our feet, our piggy toes into these beans. We’re not hind-in-high in mud, here. It’s classic bean mashing. It’s saying, “I messed up. I’m the President, but I messed up.”
I’m cracking myself up, here, as I type this; not a condescending bone in my body!! It’s always good when you can be your own entertainment!
It’s ‘The Club’! The famous Condescending Club that keeps us apart, lol…
Okay, okay, to the beans. Sorry ’bout the commercial break of interruption!
Buy the cheapest can of beans for this, because they mash great–2 cans. Drain, first; then get the club mashing it up like hogs in mud. Paper towels will be a necessity to squeeze the beans through after the mashing. We’re eccentric. We’re nuts!
Next, as we go along ‘skipping around the posies‘– whisk 2 eggs with the beans and 1 can of evaporated milk. Whisk in added ingredients of 3/4 cups sugar, 1 teaspoon cinnamon, 1/2 teaspoon pumpkin pie spice, 1/2 teaspoon salt, and guess what else?–BEER.
I probably put in 1 to 2 teaspoons–or a slight drizzle. This pie was an experiment that turned out pretty good–as crazy as it was slapped together.
At this point of photograph above, if you have any left over, pour it into a buttered baking dish to bake alongside the pie–or in a 12-inch pie plate which would solve every problem!!
Delusional?
Carefully and slowly carry it to the oven without tripping, spilling it all over your feet! Don’t bump into corners, edges or railing! Don’t trip over the dog’s tail lol. Or over your own two feet. Remember, small fingers and hands, plus feet, are delusional but you can do it!
(What am I going to write about when Trump is out of office)…don’t answer.
Bake at 325 until just set. Yes, a term. If edges of pie get too dark, cover with foil, the old-fashioned way of getting it done.
Allow it to cool completely, then place in the ‘fridge.
It’s great with sprinkled pumpkin pie spice over the homemade whipped cream. Just whisk in a mixer, cold bowl, 2 cups heavy whipping cream until thickened along with sifted powdered sugar (2 to 3 tablespoons), and 1 teaspoon of vanilla extract or the scraping of a vanilla bean. Try not to get it too sweet–so it doesn’t overpower the pie!
It’s a tough business!
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